Wisdom and Encouragement with Marilyn Monmouth Williams

Transcription

Wisdom and Encouragement with Marilynn Monmouth Williams

Widow's Walk Part 3

[00:00:00] Rev. Michele Owes: Welcome back. We are in part three of the Widow’s Walk. This is the Teachable Woman Podcast and we are Teachers of Good Things. I am with the one and only Marilyn Monmouth Williams.

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: Michelle. It's good to be here with you. We've been having a blast.

Rev. Michele Owes: Yes, we have. Marilyn and I wanted to take a moment and acknowledge, in our sharing of the Widow’s Walk, that there may have been relationships that were not as we would have liked, or not as God had [00:01:00] planned. There may be some widows who are from abusive relationships that are from painful relationships, things that one would never want to even utter.

Rev. Michele Owes: We do acknowledge that with the pain of the loss of a loved one, there can also be the pain of some of the experiences that you lived through. We want to share from that vantage point. Marilyn, I'm going to let you start.

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: Yes. None of us ever know what truly goes on in a relationship.

Rev. Michele Owes: Amen.

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: We know things from the outside looking in, but we don't know what's going on in a relationship. There may be some ladies out there who were not experiencing that true love that we all seek. They may [00:02:00] have been in physically abusive relationships. They may be in verbally abusive relationships. They may have been in controlling relationships. There are all types of relationships out there. Now their spouse has gone on to be with the Lord and they may not know exactly how to feel.

Rev. Michele Owes: Yeah.

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: On the one hand they may be feeling like free at last, free at last, thank God I'm free at last!

Rev. Michele Owes: Amen.

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: On the other hand, they still loved that person even though they were in that type of relationship. They're grieving that person and so their emotions may be all over the place.

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: One day they may be crying because of the loss, and the next day they may be thinking, Oh wow, I can do this now.

[00:03:00] Rev. Michele Owes: Yeah. Absolutely.

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: My husband’s grandmother lived with us. She said her husband was mean to her sometimes. She told him you're gonna be long dead and gone and I'm gonna be flying on airplanes. True enough, Grandma lived to fly on airplanes to visit people and enjoy herself. We cannot cookie-cut, or have a cookie-cutter, position on these things because we're in all types of relationships. We go through the good, bad, and the ugly. Even in these wonderful relationships that we had, there were some times that there were some ugly parts to it.

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: It wasn't always just beautiful. And so, you know, we want to just acknowledge that, but we still acknowledge the fact that we do grieve those relationships, even if they weren't the ones we hoped for.

[00:04:00] Rev. Michele Owes: Amen.

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: God saw you through whatever your relationship was. He's seeing you through it now. He's seeing you through as you process, what has gone on. And so, we're just so thankful for, a God who comforts us at whatever level we need.

Rev. Michele Owes: Amen. Thank you so much for how you shared that with us. There is no judgment of any person in terms of whatever type of relationship they find themselves in. Sometimes you can start off thinking something is one way. By the time you get married and you're in close quarters, it's a whole other ball game as you work on the day-to-day.

Rev. Michele Owes: We want to acknowledge that there were challenges in [00:05:00] some relationships that may cause us to feel emotionally conflicted at this stage of development, but Maryland is right. God is there to see you through all of it. And she's going to share a Scripture with you right now, so that we can rely upon how God feels.

Rev. Michele Owes: Uh, about the fatherless and the widow

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: Okay. In Psalms 146:9, God tells us, The Lord preserveth the strangers. He relieveth the fatherless and widow. But the way of the wicked, he turned it upside down. I just praise God for the fact that he is always thinking of us. We are dear to him. We are dear to his heart. We are his [00:06:00] daughters and he loves us. And I praise God for the love that he has given to us. Let me just go back and say one thing about the little story that I told you guys about Grandma. She did say that her husband could be the sweetest man in the world, but then he could be the meanest man in the world and some of us have lived with that.

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: Well, we've seen that sweetness and we've seen that meanness And all of that, we process it, and we continue to process it, but God is with us as we process it and as we grieve through those moments.

Rev. Michele Owes: Amen, amen to that. As it relates to how we proceed in the future, I think that Paul just said it perfectly in Philippians 3:13-14, he says, [00:07:00] Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended, but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.

Rev. Michele Owes: Some things are behind us. It would be for our benefit to just forget those things, those abusive moments, those very, very painful moments, those times where you found yourself in a relationship that was of no benefit seemingly. Those are things that we can take time to forget.

Rev. Michele Owes: We can learn what we need to learn from those situations and grow where we need to grow in those situations. But then reach forth for the things that are before us. Our loved one went home to be with the Lord. We are [00:08:00] still here. The fact that we are living and breathing, still have a sound mind, and the mobility of our limbs means that God's not done with us yet. There's much that we can do, and we do that for the furtherance of the Gospel. Paul referred to it as the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.

Rev. Michele Owes: Marilyn and I are sitting here today as two old friends. She was the first lady of our church when I was a young Christian. I don't think anyone else was better suited to manage all that I did not know about church, as well suited as Maryland was. I'm going to tell you this funny story. When I was new to ministry, there was not a lot that I did well because I did not know the ways of the church. I did not know when [00:09:00] to stand or when to sit. When to come or when to go. I would say, why do people stick up that finger?

Rev. Michele Owes: There was a person in our church who would stick up his index finger whenever he was coming in. I would ask, why is he doing that? Is he saying, wait a minute? There is so much that people do not know about church. If you're going to be in a position of leadership, you have to have a heart for not only the unlovable but also those who just don't know the basic things.

Rev. Michele Owes: I was in several ministries of the church and I didn't do a good job. I started as an usher and I was never paying attention when it was time to get off the floor. The leader of the ushers was just so kind. She would wait. Sometimes my husband used to call me because the ushers were waiting to get off the floor. I was so busy listening to what the pastor was saying. I don't think I ever handed out a tissue. I don't think I did any of the stuff that ushers [00:10:00] were supposed to do. I didn't do any of that because my mind was so focused on what the pastor was teaching.

Rev. Michele Owes: My husband used to call me off the floor. I think they had a meeting in the back room saying we had to give her something else to do. They allowed me to be a stewardess. I went to the stewardess and at that time we were baking the unleavened bread.

Rev. Michele Owes: Oh, boy. I was given the recipe and I had the bright idea to brown the unleavened bread. When I did, my pastor had the toughest time trying to break the bread. And even those who were in my ministry were saying, I am not eating that bread. It was terrible.

Rev. Michele Owes: One day I was cleaning up the fellowship hall and the other people had left. Some visitors were still there. I took the other tablecloths off and cleaned up the tables. There was just one table where people just continued to sit and laugh and talk and didn't seem to realize that the event was over. We were cleaning up and in essence, they needed to go.

Rev. Michele Owes: So I thought it was a nice thing to say to ask them if they would please lift their plate. And when they lifted their plates, you know, I said, excuse me, please. I said, would you be kind enough to lift up your plate for me? And they lifted up their plates. And when they lifted up their plates, I slid the tablecloth off the table.

Rev. Michele Owes: Not because I was trying to be rude, but because I needed to leave. It was time for me to go. I was responsible for washing those tablecloths. I was trying to get my job done. I didn't tell them they had to leave. Just give me the tablecloth and let me go. And Marilyn was always so kind to [00:12:00] me. So kind in how she responded.

Rev. Michele Owes: There was so much love in her voice. You know, it was like, let me not throw her away. Let me not harm her, but let me help her to understand. We just don't take tablecloths off the table. Okay, Marilyn, share how you handled me. Cause I was a wreck going someplace to happen but you handled me so lovingly.

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: When I was watching that, I thought I was at a magic show. Michele just pulled that tablecloth from under those plates so quickly. It was really kind of hilarious, but I knew her heart. I knew she wanted to serve, and so that goes a long way. So I just came along, put my arms around her, just let her know that's just not the way we do it. We wait for the people to [00:13:00] to finish and we don't just do the magic act with their plates and the tablecloth. We laugh about it now, but I did know her heart. I knew she loved Jesus. I knew she loved the people, but she was so task-oriented.

Rev. Michele Owes: Yes. Yes. I have to check myself today. Okay. Because the task comes before me whenever I'm writing or doing something. After I get the task written I go back and start with, hello, how are you? I go back to the people part after the task part. I remember when I baked the unleavened bread and I did a bad job.

Rev. Michele Owes: And the pastor couldn't break it for the service, and it was just really, really hard. He asked while he was at the altar who baked the [00:14:00] bread. So, the whole church knew who made a mess of the bread. I over-kneaded it. I cooked it too long. The way the young lady who was over that ministry handled that was equally as kind.

Rev. Michele Owes: She said to me, Mrs. Owes, we understand that you, you baked the bread for us, and listen, this is what we would like to do. We don't want you to worry about baking that bread ever again. We're going to have so and so who is a baker. I'm not going to put her name out on the front street.

Rev. Michele Owes: She's a baker and she knows how to bake better than the rest of us. We're not going to bake bread anymore. We're just going to let her bake the bread for communion. And so I said, are y'all kicking me out? And she said, no, we are not kicking you out. We want you to be a part of this ministry. We're not going to bother you with baking the bread anymore.

[00:15:00] Rev. Michele Owes: It's over.

Rev. Michele Owes: So I thought, I've been kicked out of the ushers. I can't bake the bread for communion. I don't know how to clean the tables when people won't leave. I don't know what to do, but I'm still in the church. I still want to serve the Lord. What can I do? And I asked God, I said, God, what can I do?

Rev. Michele Owes: Me being who I am, what can I do? And God told me to clean the church. And I don't know if you remembered, but after every service, I cleaned the sanctuary and when my husband got his assignment in California. I still cleaned that sanctuary after every service. I am a member of another local church now in Houston. I still clean the sanctuary. I have never stopped cleaning the sanctuary because it is the one thing that I can do and I do it [00:16:00] decently. I'm not offending anyone with what I don't know, but whenever someone walks into the house of the Lord, if I'm a member there, I want them to know that God's property is well cared for and we care for it because of our love for Him.

Rev. Michele Owes: One of the reasons that we're sharing some of these funny stories with you about what a terrible member I was is we hope that the care that Marilyn demonstrated to me as an unlearned new Christian, that you'll consider that same kind of care for people who will come into the doors of your church.

Rev. Michele Owes: You don't know who they are in the Lord. You don't know how God wants to use them. But what we do know is that you don't want to bruise them. You don't want to offend them. You don't want to tear them down. They're there. And the fact that they're there and they keep showing up is [00:17:00] an indication that they love God.

Rev. Michele Owes: And God is trusting you with how you care for them in the body of Christ. Nobody should be turned away. Nobody should be scolded. Nobody. There is a loving way to do everything. I'm going to end it with this. How much more is the widow who is in so much pain that even if you think that the widow should have, “gotten over it by now”? Even if you think she should be way past this, how long do you want to mourn?

Rev. Michele Owes: There is a loving way to handle everything, and it was so loving that 30-plus years later when God tasked me with a podcast, I had no hesitation in calling Marilyn Monmouth. When I relocated and got back to the [00:18:00] same city in which she resides, she was one of the first people that I called because of how she handled me.

Rev. Michele Owes: I hadn't seen her. I had been away for 20-something years. But the love was still the same. That same care, even after the loss of two husbands, that same Christian character that I met as a young adult unlearned Christian was the same love that meets you today.

Rev. Michele Owes: I am prayerful that what we've shared can minister to our hearts today. Not just for how we care for the widow, but how we care for anyone who walks into the doors of God's church because it's His house and we're His people.

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: Amen.

Rev. Michele Owes: He wants us to care for them.

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: Amen.

[00:19:00] Rev. Michele Owes: Marilyn, is there anything you want to share and close us out with?

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: I just want to share that I love you. You made a statement about the one thing that you can do. The thing that you do so exceptionally well is to teach God's word. That's the thing that I cherish the most about you. It is your teaching of God's word.

Rev. Michele Owes: Thank you so much, Marilyn. Your living of God's word has been something that I have cherished forever and it's never changed. Even when we had to have a tough conversation, you were still always smiling and you could always have a little chuckle in there somewhere. You were teaching me something, correcting me about something, but there was still always a smile and I never felt condemned.

Rev. Michele Owes: I never felt condemned. When I look back at the fact that I took a tablecloth off the table, I can laugh about it today, but it was like, girl, [00:20:00] who were you? When I look back on the fact that I tried to brown the elements and over-kneaded it, it's like, why did you need to brown the bread?

Rev. Michele Owes: Just, it was, you know what I mean? Just unlearned not trying to harm but unlearned. God had to handpick who he could trust me with. I don't know if people understand that God has to be able to trust us with who He sends. But God had to hand-picked you and trusted you with me and me with you.

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: Amen. Amen.

Rev. Michele Owes He had to do a lot more trusting of you because I didn't know anything, save Jesus. And I was just freshly saved as they would say, [00:21:00] fresh off the boat and had so much to learn. What a wonderful place to learn how to be a Christian. Many of you listening may not know this, but most of the members that I know from that church are still serving the Lord, no matter where we all landed.

Rev. Michele Owes: We're still serving the Lord. More preachers came out of that church. Oh my goodness. More churches were started from that church. Not just my generation, but the second and the third generation are still following the Lord. And that is a testament to a beautiful ministry and you were an integral part of it.

Rev. Michele Owes: I want to say thank you for that.

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: Praise the Lord. Praise the Lord.

Rev. Michele Owes: Amen. That is going to conclude our third teaching of the Widow's Walk. Thank you so much for being with us, Marilyn. Thank you [00:22:00] so much for your time today. I will be calling you again.

Marilyn Monmouth Williams: Thank you, Michele.

Rev. Michele Owes: All right. I love you. Thank you all for listening. We love you. We pray that something was said or done that ministered to your heart and will make a difference in your life. Don't forget about our retreat in Houston, Texas, from July 25th through the 27th of 2024, at the Westin Oak Hotel. Go to the teachablewoman.com website and you'll find all the information that you need to register.

We love you. Bye.